Thursday, July 16, 2009

Bye Bye Kiosk Nazis!!

Do you remember your favorite mall BEFORE kiosks came onto the scene? I used to take pleasure in being able to casually stroll the maul mall while shopping. Shopping for me, was a time to relax. However.....

With the advent of the mall kiosk and their hyper-aggressive sales people, I had to change my shopping habits. I never made eye contact with these folks. When I saw one of these people approaching me, I would instantly become a pseudo-celebrity and whip out my cell phone and be so engrossed in my "conversation" that they wouldn't dare bother me - - but they did.

"Excuse, m'am! Can I ask you a question?" asks the gal with the disheveled hair who happens to be wielding a leopard print flat-iron. I say "Sorry, no time." "Two minutes, I promise" says the over-ambitious young lady. "Please?". "No thanks" I mutter and continue on my way only to be accosted by yet another kiosk Nazi just a few feet ahead whose sole existence is to try and convince me to buy whatever crap he is selling. We partake in the same conversation I had with the flat-iron chick and I quickly find my way to the nearest exit to seek refuge in the front seat of my car.

It got to the point where I found myself planning covert maneuvers; stealthily sneaking from store to store trying to avoid the "kiosk people" at all costs. Shopping had indeed become a pain in the ass!

Yesterday during a visit to our local mall, I had discovered that the lotion squirters, cellular pitchmen and aromatherapy peddlers have all closed up shop. It was at that moment that I felt a little better about the downturn in our economy.

However, in their place, we now have TWO eyebrow threading kiosks (have you seen how they do this??), another that offers reflexology massages (in the middle of the mall!) and a kiosk manned by a "Maytag Repairman-esque" real estate agent.

All THAT being said, if I ever happen to meet the marketing genius behind the mall kiosk idea, I would bend him over and shove a leopard-print flat iron right where the sun don't shine!

1 comment:

sprinkles said...

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